To convince your spouse to save the marriage:

Accept responsibility None of us are perfect! As the old adage says, “To err is to be human.” Acknowledging and accepting responsibility for the mistakes you made in your marriage can help resolve conflicts and hurt feelings. It shows your spouse that you realize that you contribute to the problems in your marriage.

Talk and Listen: Let your wife or husband know how you feel by talking things out. Use “I” statements. Don’t say, “You hurt me.” Instead say, I felt hurt.” Try to avoid saying “You” in an accusing way. Take the time to listen to your spouse. Let them tell you their concerns and how they feel. Be willing to listen to a different persceptive about your marriage. Talking and listening to each other can create an atmosphere for the two of you to work things out so that you can save your marriage.

Seek Advice/Counseling:If you are a person of faith, you can seek the advice of your pastor. Ask that prayer be offered for the reconciliation between you and your spouse. If you prefer a secular approach to solving your marriage problem, you can seek out the advice of a professional that specialize in marriage and family counseling. Approach the subject of counseling with sensitivity. Understand that your husband may unwilling to even consider counseling. He may feel pressured by you and think you are blaming the problems in your marriage on him. Don’t stoop to any form of manipulation by pleading with him. Don’t threaten to harm yourself, if he refuse to agree to attend counseling with you.

Look after yourself: Get the proper amount of rest to look and feel your best. Even though you are going through a difficult period in your marriage, don’t neglect to take good care of your health. Make sure you perform your everyday responsibilities. If it necessary, get someone to help you with the issues you may be struggling to overcome.

Give it Time: Even though your efforts are not showing a positive result at first in convincing your spouse to save the marriage, don’t loose hope. They just may need time to realize your commitment to the marriage and that it is worth saving. If the end result is that your spouse decides to continue the marriage, having had the patience to see things through, will make the wait worthwhile.

Have you notice a change in your marriage? What was once a hot and heavy relationship between you, now barely flickers. Over time the relationship you share may take on a lackluster existence. The flames of passion are no longer stirred. After years of being married, living together can become a mundane, where you perform daily routines that shape your life. To prevent this from happening, you must prioritize and set aside time to rekindle and ignite the flame of passion again. It requires effort, a commitment to each other to maintain the marriage.Here are 5 suggestions to help you discover ways to rekindle the fire and spark the passion in your marriage to save it.

1. Keep the romance In Your Relationship!

Candlelight dinners, walks along the beach, listening to music. It doesn’t have to consume a lot of your time for you to get those precious moments together. It can be something as simple as sitting on a bench in the park watching the sunset. Or huddle up together on the couch looking at your favorite movie videos. Find what works for the two of you by using your own imagination in creating romance.

2. Add Some Spontaneity.

Most of us have that little kid inside that likes surprises. That spontaneity, when you are invited to a trendy new restaurant with jamming music and delectable food. Think how your partner would feel to be surprise by you with something special. You can send some flowers or a text message expressing sentiments of affection. Spontaneity is what adds a spark to an otherwise monotonous day. It creates those moments that makes life pleasurable and results in keeping a fire inside of you burning.

3. Take Time to Talk

This is such a simple thing to do. Yet, often couples fail to spend time just listening to each other. Not listening to your partner can result in a disconnect to each other emotionally. Everyone gets tired due to work, the demands of your time, and just the every day stresses of life. It’s important to listen, to hear what you need and want from each other.

4. Be Enthusiastic!

Remember how you waited with anticipation to see that special someone. You showed interest in what they said and did. There was an excitement that made them feel loved and important to you. This was the reason why you married them. Recapturing those feelings for each other again will light a fire that can save your marriage.

5. Do Something Different, Adventurous!

Take that cooking class together. Try an outdoor activity. It doesn’t matter what you do, the key is to try something that takes you out of the comfort zone you have grown accustomed to. It gives you both a chance to experience something new that recaptures those special feelings of closeness to each other again, like when you first fell in love. You can set aside a night to read romantic passages from a book or write your own. The two of you can prepare some portions of food that you both enjoy while listening to your favorite music. All it take is your time, imagination and creativity to rekindle the fire in your marriage and save it.

There will be problems in your relationship. It doesn’t matter whether you’ve been married a long time or just got together. The key is to not let them mushroom into something serious that could end your marriage. If you think back, you can remember your parents arguing and disagreeing about things. Despite having differences many married couples manage to stay together.

Before you were married everything may have seemed perfect. Not even a discouraging word was heard between the two of you. But now that you are married, you have begun to notice some blemishs in your partner’s personality. There are things that your partner does which is annoying and downright irritating to you at times. But unless your partner has drastically changed, there’s no reason to be concern. It’s just that now you are upclose, living in an intimate relationship where you are in contact with each other on a daily basis. So, like the old, partners in new marriages can expect to disagree and even argue at times.

Apply these 5 tips to safeguard against your arguing escalating into something serious.

First: Talk about it.

Express your thoughts and feelings, even intensely if necessary. But, avoid personal attacks that hurt your partner. Don’t say things that belittles and berates them. Communicating about things is good and can save your marriage. But it must be done in the right way.

Second: Don’t let annoyances build up.

If something is allow to fester until is oozes out, it makes a mess. It’s best to take care of things at the beginning. Problems are easier to solve when they haven’t grown and anger has set in to where feelings are now the issue and both sides are locked into their position.

Third: Stick to what the issue/problem is that’s bothering you.

Don’t be all over the place, going from one issue to another. Try to discuss things when you are both calm. If you are arguing about everything you will only exasperate each other. Try to pick the core issue that is affecting the two of you. If both sides know the problem, it is more likely a solution can be reached.

Fourth: Do what you can to resolve the matter amicably.

It will take some effort for both of you to agree to a solution. Often just sleeping on a problem is enough to bring about a new attitude and shred light on a matter. You may find the problem is no longer an issue between the two of you.

Fifth: Forgive!

This is a very important thing to do. But things may have been said or done that linger in your mind. Understand that when you or your partner have been hurt deeply, it takes time to completely forgive. Keep in mind, neither of you are perfect. When you love someone you overlook their faults and shortcomings. You accept what you cannot change about them. And I’m not talking about a partner who bestrayed your trust by cheating on you. That level of hurt you may not be able to forgive. But, if you hold on to the hurt, it will weaken your relationship. It may end the marriage.

Disagreements and arguments are a part of married life. It’s how you handle them that will determine if you will overcome them. Make a commitment to stay together. This means taking the bad with the good. Problems will come. But the two of you are a formidable team against whatever comes your way when you stick together. During difficult times, don’t forget just how much you mean to each other.

Today we live in a global world. In every major city, people from different cultures, religions and countries are rubbing shoulders with each other. So it is very natural that many are falling in love and getting married as well. But such relationships require very strong commitment and understanding. There are many barriers that couples who venture down this path will have to overcome. One such is the notion of physical intimacy or public display of affection. It varies drastically from culture to culture, country to country.

If you have a partner who comes from a different culture and the two of you are from different countries, here are some pointers on how to overcome some of the pitfalls that may present a barrier to your relationship.

First, let look at western countries. By western countries I mean the whole of Europe, the Americans and Australians. People from this region are open to public displays of affection. Sitting intimately with your loved one it more acceptable. If you have a partner who is from one of these countries, you may often see couples displaying affection in front of others. But unlike your partner, you may not be comfortable with holding hands, kissing, or hugging in public, because your social cultural background dictates that this type of affection should only be shown in private.

In Africa and especially countries where the Muslim population is strong, most outward forms of affection is not tolerated. It is better that you refrain from being too intimate or affectionate in public as not to offend the sensibilities of others or violate religious laws. Gulf States in the middle east, except for a few, going around with a woman who is not your relative, is often a punishable crime for both the man and the woman.

It is important that you learn about the social do’s and don’ts of your partner’s country before visiting there, to prevent any embarrassing situation and to avoid facing criminal liability for an infraction of their country’s laws.In some South Asian Countries the social cultural barriers to intimacy is relaxed and minimal compared to Buddhist countries like Japan and Hong Kong. But countries like Malaysia and Indonesia, where the religious faith is dominated by their Muslim beliefs, there are many social and cultural barriers to intimacy. Places like India or Sri Lanka, the customs on intimacy depends on the region or the city where you live whether you and your partner will be bound by restrictions to public displays of affection.

To reiterate, marriage between couples from different cultures, religions, and social backgrounds, are commonplace today. The thing to keep in mind is before you show some intimate affection to your partner, make sure you are aware of his or her feelings about public displays in their country. There must be an asserted effort to be sensitive to each other about intimacy issues. It is a mistake to assume you know how your partner feels. You have to discussed any intimacy issue.

Knowledge can be the bridge to understanding each other. To experience intimacy that’s satisfying it has to be something you both agree to. It starts with taking the time to talk  to each other about intimate things.

“Why can’t we figure this relationship thing out?” Have you ever had that question? It doesn’t seem that it should be difficult, but at least in the U.S., the chances of a marriage making it is almost a coin toss!

I have spent the last 2 decades or so reading, studying, researching, observing, and questioning this. Problem is, we often try to simplify a fairly complex thing. Relationships, any relationship, have problems. It is just the nature of humans living together.

So, at the risk of over-simplifying, let me do just that! I want to examine one dimension of this with you today. So enter with me into. . . (queue Twilight Zone theme) the Connection Dimension!

You see, I really think that the majority of marriages actually get into trouble because of becoming Connection Starved. Recent books have simplified this further into a “sex starved” situation. However, I think it is one level deeper — connection! Feeling connected, getting connection, and connecting — those are the issues.

Let’s just put together two pieces of connection: emotional connection and physical connection. Those two pieces are the root of many of our issues.

Emotional connection includes having emotional needs met, feeling heard, feeling valued, and feeling as if your spouse cares for you and to be with you. Physical connection is not just about sex. Humans are wired for touch. It can come in many forms: hugs, hand-holding, kissing, caressing, massages, and sex.

My observation is that couples become rather lackadaisical about both areas. They stop talking and listening, sharing feelings, and nurturing connection. Likewise, couples stop attending to their physical connection. Children start getting the hugs, sex slows, and suddenly, the couple has disconnected on both fronts.

Add to this the resentment of having a connection need, but feeling it is unfulfilled. We often forget, since the couple has stopped sharing emotions, that both are feeling the same thing.

In many couples, there is a difference in the necessary connection in each area. One may have a higher need for physical connection and the other a higher need for emotional connection. Over time, when one feels that he or she is not getting enough, it is natural to not give enough. Then, both people are feeling disconnected.

The result? Less connection. More than that, withholding connection. Slowly, the relationship is starved to death. Anger and hurt from feeling rejected takes over, and then the wheels fall off.

You see, my other observation is that as long as each person is getting their quota of connection, they are willing to accept that there are issues. No marriage is without issues. That is a fact of life. But those issues feel insurmountable without connection. With connection comes acceptance.

But remember, we can offer connection and acceptance on our own, when we recognize that we are free to choose our own actions, our attitude.

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This was part of an amazing best-seller book by Lee H. Baucom, click here to get it right now!

1. Seek help, but find what works best for you.

Every relationship has ups and downs with unique challenges . So a strategy that is going to work for your individual situation will be necessary. There is no answer that’s set in stone when it comes to trying to rekindle a relationship and win back love. Even the advice of family and friends has to be thought about carefully. Although there situation may seem similar to what you are going through, the solution they found to win back their love may not work for you. No two people react to a situation the same, nor experience things the same way. Patience and understanding is something you will need to work toward achieving the goal of winning back the one you love.

2. Don’t come across desperate! Identify the problems that drove you apart.

3. Remember the good things.

4. Keep your mind and emotions from negative thoughts and feelings. Even when it feels hopeless or seems like a lost cause, display a positive attitude in words and in the things you do. This will reflect to your partner that you are invested in winning back their love. In return, he or she will be more willing to try to save the relationship.

Even though every person situation is different, here are four proven tips that will start you on the path to reconciliation and getting back together. It doesn’t matter if you think your relationship is beyond fixing, many
couples have benefitted from these four tips to get the love they had back and achieve happiness again.

Tip #1 Leave the Past Behind

One of the biggest barrier that hinder reconciliation is holding on to the past. Even though it’s not the easiest thing to do, you must leave the past behind. Drudging up old hurts inflames the emotions and only serves to block any effort toward getting back together. There must be genuine forgiveness for any wrong you feel was done to you. If you can succeed in leaving the past behind and manage to forgive, it can lead both of you back to restoring your relationship.

Tip #2 Make the First Move

Don’t wait around for your ex to come back to you, thinking it’s just a matter of time. It may never happen! Someone has to take the initiative. It might as well be you, even if things don’t work out the way you desire.  Often times, the one who makes the move to get back together, sparks the other person to try and work things out too. Just saying the words, “I’m sorry,” can make all the difference in the world.

Tips #3 Don’t Over Do It!

Try to relax. Don’t appear too desperate and anxious to get back together with your ex. Allow some time to past, for feelings to be sorted out and understood. It takes time to work through difficulties. Calling your ex repeatedly and driving by where they are staying frequently makes you into a nuisance. Too many overtures toward your ex, becomes an obsession and borders on stalking. Limit yourself to calling once in awhile. Keep the conversations short and friendly.

Tip #4 Make Yourself Desirable

We always seem to want what others want. It’s human nature to want something or someone desirable. This tip is the key to winning back your ex. Instead of wallowing in despair, mopping aimlessly, get out and kickup your feet and have some fun. People are drawn to those who are cheerful and fun to be around. If your ex sees you lively and active, and how much fun you are to be around, they may think it was a mistake to let you go.

If you implement these four tips, you’ll be on the path to restoring your relationship and getting back together again with the one you love.

The simple meaning of monogamy for most people is sexual fidelity, that you and your partner do not have sex with others. Despite this obvious clear definition, there is a “gray area” that some people have difficulty seeing as “cheating.”

Most will agree that there are lines that never should be crossed. Many will remember several years ago, when a former president insisted, “I did not have sex with that woman.” As the intimate details of their relationship emerged, it seemed technically in the minds of some people, he told the truth. Yet most people would agree that his behavior was not permissible in a monogamous relationship. It was consider by many people as “blatant cheating.’

Still the “gray area” becomes an issue when there is no physical sexual contact that gives clear evidence of infidelity. You may consider any flirtatious act as a form of “cheating.” It damages a relationship to be seen as a cheater, when you think you done nothing wrong. You and your partner must decide  where the “lines will be drawn” in your relationship regarding monogamy to avoid hurt feelings, anger, and accusations.

Determining the boundaries in terms of monogamy will help the two of you discover what is acceptable for you in your relationship. Only then can you find a place of understanding and agreement. It may even save your marriage.

Some think living together can help them work out problems, letting them get to know each other
first, before marrying. But statistics and studies show that co-habitation does not result in a successful marriage. In fact, couples that live together get divorce much more often then those who simply just married.

Then there are those who feel because they witness the divorce of their parents, that they have first hand knowledge of what to avoid. Since they have experienced the heartache, seeing their parents fall out of love and getting a divorce, they are convince this will not happen to them.

True, there are things you can learn from others. But, you cannot insulate yourself from divorce based on knowledge alone about the failure of someone else’s marriage.

Studies reveal that couples who parents divorced, come out on two different sides of this issue. Some develop an intolerance for marriage. They see it as something to avoid. While others enter marriage expecting it not to last. Therefore they see divorce as inevitable. They may divorce again and again, looking for that perfect marriage.

What causes the dissolution of a marriage is as varied as the couples involved in this complicated relationship. Since the beginning of time experts have been trying to figure out what keeps married couples together.

The one thing that marriage counselors and other specialist agree on is that communication has to be the foundation of this relationship to avoid being divorced. And there needs to be an unwavering commitment to your marriage.

Married couples who talk, and even argue, have a better chance of not getting a divorce. But failure to work through things, may result in the marriage ending. At the very least, the marriage will not be satisfying nor fulfilling.

Decide what you can accept in your marriage. For some, infidelity is a marriage breaker. Others, it is any form of abuse: alcohol, drugs, physical, controling behavior, etc.

As stated before, marriage is a complicated relationship. What makes it so, is the people involved. The reasons for divorce is as varied as the individuals in marriage. Couples break up for any number of reasons, for selfishness, to sex and money, to cultural differences, immaturity, refusal to help with household chores, to different approaches to rearing children, etc.

Marriage can last, even in modern and non-traditional times, but it takes two people with an unwavering love and commitment to each other, and a willingness to communicate about anything and everything.

Here are 5 things you can do to help your partner relax.

1. Make them a bubble bath with scented candles with their favorite music playing. It will put them in a peaceful mood.

2. Offer them a back rub. Using lotion or rubbing alcohol, soothe and massage down to their feet those aching and tired muscles.  If they have any gratitude, you will be thanked for it.

3. Put off any contentious matter or complain for another day. You don’t want to ruin the positive atmosphere you have created.  Nagging is like scratching fingernails on a chalkboard. Avoid it!

4. Give them some time to watch their favorite show, a game,  read the newspaper, or whatever.  Everyone needs some space to themselves sometimes. When you have some time apart, it makes being together more special,

5. Overlook those imperfections. Even though your partner may be the biggest klutz you know, make him or her feel like they are the best thing in your life.  Let them know just how special they are to you.